diaryofthemenopause

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“What if I feel less feminine?”

on June 23, 2014

The first of the symptoms started today, but that is just “feminine dryness” where everything is now beginning to heal up and clear up.  Nice!!  The staples were removed today, which is a massive relief.  I feel so much more comfortable.  It seems I was allergic to the metal of the staples, and that may be what is causing my rash, but it was also causing severe irritation around the entry sites on both sides of the staples.  That should clear up now.  I’ve also finished all antibiotics as of today, so am now medication free.  Today is a massive milestone as now it should just be a case of time.

So with no other symptoms yet, I started wondering about some of the concerns with hysterectomies.  One of the main concerns was that “If I have my Uterus removed, will I feel less feminine?”.  OK, so I’m not the most girlie girl in the world, and in all honesty I’ve never been that attached to my uterus – it’s been nothing but an annoyance since I hit puberty.  I had a very lax attitude to this whole operation, and at no point did I ever think I’d miss my uterus or feel differently.  You do tend to wonder if this attitude will come back to bite you at a later date.

I feel no different without it. Actually that’s not quite true, I feel better without it.  How feminine I feel, or any other feelings I had before this operation are still there. I’m still me, I feel no different now it’s been removed and I have no regrets at all that I did the right thing.  What is very noticeable is the lack of pain that I had from over where the cysts were on my ovaries.  I always knew it existed, but I hadn’t realised it was a permanent fixture in my life, and now it’s not there, it feels lovely. Even with the uncomfortable feeling that comes with hysterectomy recovery, the loss of that pain is very noticeable.  The other noticeable difference is a change in my colour.  I’ve been fighting anaemia for so long now, and living on iron tablets to get by.  I see myself in the mirror and I look healthy.  I feel healthy, despite the operation recovery going on I feel better and with more energy than I have in years.  I am taking the recovery slowly, as I know all to well how much damage I can do if I don’t follow the strict 6 week rule, but I can’t wait to see how I am in 5 weeks time when that’s all over.  I feel better today than I have in such a long, long time.

It’s still early days for me.  It’s been 13 days since my first operation.  I already feel amazing and am so glad that I put myself through this.  Hopefully things will continue forward in that same way.

 

 

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